Once upon a time, in a land far far away, there lived a pretty princess named Penelope P. Picketpatch. Her favorite colour was pink and her favorite pass time was to pick pretty flowers. She had a plump little piglet named Polly that stayed with her everywhere she went. Penelope and Polly lived in a pretty puce palace. There, they lived with her papa, King Paul Picketpatch XVI, who was the ruler of the land of Piweurds.

King Paul was a very pale man. He never went out in the sun unless it was to sit on the palace porch with a bottle of pepsi, his favorite drink, and a slice of pizza. Because of his diet, King Paul was quite pudgy.